Sunday, February 18, 2007

On Jaywalking and Other Pointless Topics

A few random thoughts from the holy land:

1. When it comes to jaywalking Israelis just don't get it. Memo to Israelis: When there are no cars coming down a narrow street it is o.k. to walk to the other side. CROSS THE STREET!!! You are blocking my way.
Actually, some Israelis take it to the extreme and decide that they have nothing to fear from multi- ton vehicles hurtling their way at fifty miles an hour, and cross right in the middle of oncoming traffic. Let's find a happy medium guys.

2. Yes, I know that my son/daughter is dressed too warmly/not warm enough/too girly/not feminine enough/ and is leaning out of the stroller/walking when he should be in the stroller/poking his sister's eyes out/pulling her brother's hair or is lagging behind developmentally/too developed (???)/not talking enough/talking too much, but thank you random stranger for pointing that out.

3. My Hebrew officially stinks and I am awful at learning languages.

4. Apparently, my community's idea of a beautification project is creating intricate patterns of dog excrement on the streets and sidewalk. This type of creativity soars way over my head, but then again, I have never been a big fan of modern art.

5. The human ego's desire for cheap feelings of superiority knows no bounds. In my case it is Israeli self righteousness syndrome (which I am hoping will be inserted into the DSM V). It is so incredibly easy to fall into this trap, which I vowed to avoid. However, I occasionally catch myself looking at a group of American tourists and saying to myself in a sinister voice, "Ha, ha, ha, those foolish, petty Americans." Which is exactly how every real Israeli looks at me.

That is all for now.